When beliefs collide

I looked up the term cognitive dissonance on Wikipedia just now. It had been rolling around in my head for a couple of days, and even though I knew generally what it means, I wanted to get a solid definition:

"Cognitive dissonance is an uncomfortable feeling or stress caused by holding two contradictory ideas simultaneously. The theory of cognitive dissonance proposes that people have a fundamental cognitive drive to reduce this dissonance by modifying an existing belief, or rejecting one of the contradictory ideas." (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance)

So why is that on my mind? Because someone has been on my mind. Someone whom I care about very much, whose beliefs have come to collide with my own. Whenever that happens I get a queasy, disconcerted feeling. I want to weep and despair at the gap between us, or to bend reality to bring that person into alignment with me. I want to change the rules so that we can both play on without being disqualified, but that's just the point.. I'm not writing the rules and its not my game. It's not a game at all. This is life, reality, God's world, and we are His workmanship in Christ. In Christ. If I believe that that one reality is central and defining to the rest of my reality, then there is no bending the rules. You are either in or out, alive or dead, forgiven or an enemy of God. Cognitive dissonance occurs when we do not care to hold on to two irreconcilable realities. One of my greatest fears is that I or someone I care about will succumb to the pressure to resolve a matter of great importance by choosing the option that brings the least anxiety. I have seen many many people who believe that God rewards 'goodness' with 'acceptance.' When pressed, the notion seems to rest on the central belief that God is not really exacting in His standards or threatening in His potential judgment. The idea that He could be a God who is demanding because of His holiness and character is just too scary, and so is refused access as an abiding concept. Cognitive dissonance avoided. Of course, I do it too. Even though I have experienced a small taste of the terribleness of God's glory, I avoid living immersed in that context. Its like staring at the sun. Sure you did it once when you were on a field trip in the fourth grade to see the eclipse, even though your teacher said it could blind you if you did... that doesn't mean you stare at it ever day. You would be blind. God's presence is like that. Being around Him, near Him, His exposure is something we think we want. In reality, it would scour us away. It would make us beg to be destroyed so that we might not taint the revelation of His beauty. We would plead with Him to cast us into Hell in light of the corruption we bring. This notion that God owes us a break or a little slack because its so hard to be good is a notion entirely devoid of any real experience of God. It has only our pleasure in mind and not the reality of a Holy God. So, cognitive dissonance rules pop spirituality in America these days. Not a popular accusation to make, but I believe a true one. The question is, how much friendship will it cost me when I attempt to wake the dead. How much do they love their slumber?